Bad Combination

Some people like coffee, most people don't. Most people think they like coffee but really they just like to add a bunch of flavors to it and then they call themselves coffee drinkers. I secretly laugh at them because I know they are not. So I think that what I need to do is invent a theme day. And this day will be called "Barista's Choice." And then I will make for everyone the drinks they should have. There will be no milkshakes, no white mochas, and no large cappuccinos since you should always order those in the 8 ounce size anyway. I think people will probably really like that. Afterall, how can you not trust the #1 employee?

There is this man who is named after a Tree. He is very tall. Also skinny. Also very weird. I say this because he is trying to be manly in some ways but he's also like a girl. And he's almost always nervous. So he had been ordering this soy blended drink. I would make it special for him since I figured he was lactose intolerant. But then I assumed wrongly because today he wanted me to add ice cream to it. So then it became part milkshake part girly drink. And as it blends together in all it's gloriousness, he pulls out a cigar. I wonder if he's going to "double fist." And then I picture his voice changing after each thing. After a smoke he speaks in a really deep voice, and then after a sip of his drink, in a really high girly voice. That would be funny. And then I can understand why you need both those things to establish a balance. But if not, well then I have one comment.

Hey tree man, smoking is bad for you. And also so are girly drinks.